Absolute crap,  F/M

Slashes in the Snow by M. Never

This is poor, poor writing. And I’m sorely disappointed.

I was convinced to read Slashes in the Snow by lots of amazing reviews and the fact that one of my favourite authors promoted this book. I absolutely see how authors promoting each others work benefits them, but this sucky read has most definitely affected how I view said author.

Slashes in the Snow is about Ky and Kira. They’re technically step-siblings but live in entirely different worlds. Ky’s the badass biker with a gigantic chip on his shoulder and Kira is the supposedly spoilt little rich girl that needs his help. Kira is convinced that someone’s stalking her and she turns to Ky and his motorcycle gang for protection.

Slashes in the Snow is over the top clichéd. In itself, that doesn’t have to make the read a bad one. But unfortunately, that’s not the only thing bringing this book down. The dynamics between the two main characters is very crudely rendered. And how their relationship evolves isn’t even remotely believable. Instant physical attraction and intense feelings of dislike, but once they jump each others bones they’re in love. Ky is as volatile as a toddler with the tantrums to match. One moment he tells Kira to kill herself, the next he loves her but is pissed that she’s hesitant to forgive him.

And don’t get me started on the writing itself. There were so many silly expressions and regular word-vomit that I’m wondering if the author did it on purpose to see if she could get away with it. Or how about “brainwashing passion”, “slow but fitful fucking”, “chaotic grabbing”, a jaw that “tightens as severly as [his] balls”. Ky is “opressed by the weight of [Kira’s] ecstasy”. And apparently, Ky is also able to fly since he “hovers himself” over Kira.

I’m thinking that a thesaurus was M. Never’s constant companion while writing Slashes in the Snow. Beacuse it appears that she tried to get as many alliterations in there as possible. How about Ky eating Kira out with no “reserve, restraint or repression.” Or Kira hearing “heavy, horrid, harrowing footsteps”?

And if there aren’t alliterations, Never still describes everything three times. Ky’s “possessive, dominant, demanding”. He’s Kira’s “sworn disciple. A vowed protector. A pledged soldier”. Kira feels “weak, feeble and tamed.”

Reading this book was exhausting. And there is no end to all the super weird shag descriptions!

Ky “sucks monstrously” on Kira’s clit.

Ky’s cock “sharpens and swells, stabbing into [Kira] like a meaty knife”.

Or when Ky “pumps [his] erection with bloodthirsty anticipation”.

There’s one truly dubious sentence where Kira is “concentrating on all the sensations [Ky’s] conjuring around the girth of his erection”. Really?!?

And then there’s my personal favourite, “huh, huh, huh, huh.”

I’ll just end this review with the most abysmal description of an orgasm I’ve ever read: “Something inside of me cracks, just crumbles right to pieces, and I fall, spiraling into a black abyss. No sound flows out of my mouth, just a silent gasp that seems to engulf me. That hold me hostage until Ky comes so deep and violent inside me, that for a flash I split right in two”.

I don’t know about you, but I don’t think that sounds comfortable at all. It resembles a death-scene more than anything. So a very weird read indeed.

0

I'm a Swedish book nerd reading mostly steamy English romance novels. And since there is so much good stuff out there, and so much shitty stuff too. I just want to give credit where it's due (and diss the rest).